Everyone has at least one. It might not reach the level that it could be considered an obsession. Right now, mine would be Spencer Barrick. You should already know who this is if you have read the other posts, although according to my site numbers, I am thinking my BFF is probably the only one.

Anyway.. He is an adult performer with the stage name of Damon Dice. Yes, I know, I could just say porn, but adult entertainment sounds more sensual, doesn’t it? Like getting intimate versus fucking. I agree, there is definitely a time to use each one to strike the desired mood. See what happens when Damon is mentioned? Just give me a moment to get back what I was thinking.

So, after discovering DD, I found myself looking for information about Spencer. If you are curious, his Instagram account is @SpencerMichaelBarrick which is fairly PG. For more racier content, you can check out his twitter account, SpencerMBarrick. Or just a general search in google will bring up thousands of sites and videos.

One link I found interesting is a podcast that he did in September which he posted on his Instagram account. It can be found here: ‎Well Connected with KrisMo and Gbills: Episode 65- Spencer Michael Barrick aka Damon Dice on Apple Podcasts. The part I liked the best was the explanation of why he decided to put his social media in his name rather than his persona. He has watched many different performers suffer from type casting and losing their unique personalities. I was impressed as how succinct that was because I think of Spencer and Damon as two different people. Don’t misunderstand me. Damon is hot AF, but in a one night stand or booty call buddy way. Spencer, on the other hand, is someone I would really like to get to know personally and, maybe, hang out. So, Spencer, if you are looking for another friend, message me.

How I like thee, Spencer, let me count the ways.. Ok, not really, but…

So, just to be crystal clear, I haven’t met or talked to him. All my opinions are based on information I have found on the internet including Instagram, Twitter, interviews, and posted information on websites. I will admit that I could have filled in things with what I wanted, but who doesn’t? Even if I am completely off base, my ‘fantasy’ has encouraged me to be brave enough to make some life changes. I feel like that is a win, so let me fantasize.

I think the article that started it all for me was 8 Tips For You To Be More Confident – P.S. Good Times (psgoodtimes.com). I was at the right point in my life to really take most of it to heart. I don’t know if Spencer wrote it, but just let me pretend, okay?

Here are the main topics:

  • Get Rid of Self-Limiting Beliefs and Practices – Essentially, believe in yourself and just do it. Got it.
  • Improve Your Body Image – Workout, lose weight, get more sleep and you’ll look better which will make you feel better. Yep. I can say this is true cause I have been doing it. Eating more fruits and vegetables. Cut out almost all pre-processed food and fast food places. Limit the amount of beef and pork in favor of turkey, chicken, and seafood. Drink more water. My BFF and I keep each other more active with gym visits, walking, and yoga. I feel so much better and have started to see the difference on the scale and how my clothes fit.
  • Raise Your Curiosity – Ask more questions and explore. This wasn’t expected advice, but okay, I can do that.
  • Stop Comparing Yourself to Others – Self explanatory and incredibly hard to do. I know I struggle with this. My therapist says, “What others think about you is none of your business.” As I use this, especially in self-talk, I feel more willing to try things that I haven’t done before.
  • Set a Series of Small Goals and Work Towards Them – Create a list and do it. I’ve got this one. Created a bucket list for myself and have completed one (more ear piercings) and have the other one scheduled for the 16th (getting a tattoo). I have another blog written about my list, but haven’t published it yet. I like creating lists and crossing things off since it makes me feel like I am getting things done.
  • Give and Accept Compliments – Again, pretty straight forward. I have no issues giving out compliments, but do struggle with accepting them. What can I say, but working on it.
  • Listen to Some Music – I’ve never associated this with confidence, but I know that the type of music can definitely influence your mood. As I work, I listen to music and have tried to expand to different genres. It helps time pass quicker and I feel more upbeat in general. Maybe that is how it can effect confidence?
  • Overcome Your Fears and Doubts – A couple of favorite quotes from this section, “You’re the sperm that won” and “until you accept that you are an exceptional human being who deserves to feel good, none of these tips will matter”. In other words, just do it. This is like the final pep talk of the entire article and I like it.

Like I said, I was in the right frame of mind and at the right point in my life to read this. It suddenly all made sense and was something I could and wanted to do. I will occasionally read the article to motivate myself if I feel like I am losing focus or need some inspiration.

There is another one on the same site with more tips on how to be more attractive. There is a mention about shoes which makes me chuckle. I mean, I look at women’s shoes cause I just like shoes, but do men really look at shoes that other men are wearing? Or do they just look at shoes women are wearing? In my opinion, the most unattractive shoes are things like flip flops that make that smacking sound as someone is walking. A woman can be made up fabulously, but then she walks with sucking-smacking sound. Not attractive, unless maybe you are into that. Maybe there is something about shoes…